Random Thoughts by a Random Stranger

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Well, it's finally done. Yesterday, I managed to get a temporary off-center pass to go out to the mall with Amanda and Andrew, were we would be supposed to meet with Alex. Andrew didn't seeem to pleased with the idea that the only time we would get to go off-center for months would not be only with the two of us, but he didn't say much about it.

When we got there, before going to Starbucks and buying some Caramel Frapuchinno, we went to look for Alex, who didn't seem happy at all. He was sitting in a little table by the mall by himself, with a box of some kind of shoe. I really didn't pay much attention to it.

Right away after we came got him, I was all happy about my freedom, so I was all just like staring at the place, and thinking that it was just awesome that I wasn't inside of Job Corps at a Wednesday.

We eventually went to Starbucks; Amanda and me bought some frapuchinnos, but Alex staid outside, later to be accompanied by Andrew to ask him why he was so upset, I suppose. Me and Amanda just started talking, and since she's my best friend and all, I told her what has been going on recently.

After a while, Andrew came back asking us if we ever planned on going outside, so we did. We went to Macy's to smell the perfumes, and had a little fun trying to spray the boys with Britney Spears' perfume thing, which by the way stunk really bad.

I went and checked out a bag that I actually found kind of cool, but was dissapointed when I looked at the pricetag with a $60.00 dollars mark on it. Then Andrew, trying to be funny I guess, started making fun of me on that way that really annoys the crap out of me, although I know he doesn't mean it that bad (I'm not the only one that gets irritated by this, for example, on Tuesday he made my roomate cry by calling her fat in front of everybody) by calling me "his little hairy monkey".

I just looked at him with my evil look, and I told him "You're really annoying me right now" or something like that, and then he got all pissed off and walked in front of us with Alex, punching a little poster thing that was next to him.

Me and Amanda were just like "Whatever", and we went to Hot Topic where I bought myself a cool Sesshomaru plush doll and Sesshomaru t-shirt. I spent 33.80 dollars on it, but it was worth it. Since I got recently paid on Monday 118.00 dollars, it didn't hurt that much. Amanda bought herself a couple of little noserings, that she later used for her bottom lip, because according to her she couldn't use the big kind anymore.

We checked out a couple of other stores, and on our road to Bath and Body Works we saw Alex and Andrew close to some shoe-shining stall or something. He told me to wait for him, but after a couple of minutes I eventually asked him if I could just meet him there. Amanda didn't like the fact that I had to ask him for permission, and I guess she's right; that is pretty sad.

I bought this cool Cucumber and Melon Body Spray that I had my eyes on the last time I saw it (it was on sale! I saved myself six bucks) and I think Amanda bought some lotion and soap. Apparently Andrew is very fond of the smell of the body lotion, so he started sniffing me out in a way that I don't necessarily feel comfortable with.

He eventually apologized for being so grumpy after a couple of seconds; I felt like apologizing too, until I came to realize that I really shouldn't be the one aplogizing, so I just nodded my head and told him that it was all right.

We walked by the Vans store, and Amanda, playing around, told me that we should get inside the store, because there's a lot of hot guys around. I looked into the window, and the only guy I saw was one that looked like a thirteen-year-old, so I told her "Ah, but he's not very hot."

Andrew immediately started getting that annoying tone on his voice, asking me why was I checking out guys in the first place. I would have told him that I wasn't checking out anyone, which I really wasn't doing at all, if that sentence didn't sound so hypocritical. I mean, he was pictures of Victoria's Secret models on bikinis on his cell phones, he has even told me that my roomate was hot! Things like that, so I just said sarcasticly "Because I can."

That pissed him off even more, and then he just started yelling at me things that I can't even remember what they were. I rolled my eyes again, and as me and Amanda were going to go to another store, Andrew yelled at me another thing.

After a while, I just made up my mind that he wasn't going to mess up my day anymore, so I tried to forget about it and me and Amanda decided to go to Jumba Juice to cheer ourselves up with smoothes, but guess what? He was at fucking Jumba Juice, too!

As we were walking closer by them, we decided to go to McDonald's instead, but Andrew eventually stopped me yelling at me something else. Again, I don't even remember what he was saying; all his insults sound pretty much the same to me.

I just told Amanda after he was done with his bickering that we should go to the bus stop, and even Alex managed to fuck THAT up by telling me that the shuttle just left five minutes ago and we would have to wait another half an hour. I didn't say anything, so I just kept walking.

After a while of Amanda listening to my bitching, Alex came up and told me that if I cared I should go talk to Andrew. I told him I didn't want to, and then Amanda joined up and told me that I should go talk to Andrew as well. I got annoyed, and still declined, until even the people that were waiting with us for the shuttle told me to go.

Not letting go of my Sesshomaru plushie, I walked up to Andrew, who had this little hypocritical sad face, that annoyed me even more.

As I was walking up to him, I tired to think of something positive to say, but I couldn't at the time and just pointed out to him that we were always fighting and stuff like daily, and I really wasn't like that.

We talked, and for a moment there it seemed that he was going to break up with me, until he just hugged me and started kissing. I didn't kiss back, of course. Before I told him what I really wanted to do, the bus came.

Andrew sat next to me, so I thought I might as well get it over with. I asked for a break... I said that mabye we would get back together someday, but he seems to have interpreted it wrong becuase ever since we got off that bus, he's been telling everybody (I mean EVERYBODY!) that we were on a week-long break.

He said hi to me in the cafeteria at lunch, of course... but I haven't spoken to him at all. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I'm not really sad. I'm upset, confused, dazed... but yet I'm not sad. What the hell?

Posted by Maria at 1:42 PM

Comments:

When you're not sad after a break-up (I tell you by experience...) it just means that you'll really GET OVER IT :)
So I guess that's good news?
Andrew seems very dysfunctional, and you really don't need a guy like that.
For your own sanity, I'm glad you were wise enough to break off this obvious unhealthy relationship.
Anyway, I have the "Cucumber Melon" Purely Silk Body Splash, too! :)
And I also bought a $60.00 purse at Macy*s, too, but I don't know if it's the same one you were talking about!
(It's a black one!)
Well, I'm glad to see you're updating again! :)
And don't worry about this guy.
You don't have to be dealing with his emotional insecurities.

Good luck! :)

Diana.

# posted by

Diana : 6:44 PM

You recently told me that you're thinking about getting together with this guy.
Well, in the end, it's always your decision, but after reading all about what happened, I personally do not think you should go back to him.
Imagine, if he's like this when you've just started going out, how would he be if you two guys got married or something?
He doesn't seem like a stable guy, and the fact that leaving him didn't really made you sad just shows that you'd be okay without him.
Of course, it's natural after breaking up that you'll feel lonely, sad, upset...and confuse those feelings with "really loving" him.
But time tells all, and I'm pretty sure you'd do great without him.
He is not a stable guy.
And what about those "I'm going to take revenge on you and your friends" comment?
That shows shows IMMATURITY.
This is my point of view. Whatever you choose to do, good luck.

# posted by

Diana : 4:07 PM

Hello girlie :-P

I see it's been awhile since you have updated this journal. Don't use it anymore?
Anyways, on your "Dislike" section, you can get rid of "my dial-up connection"...since you should be enjoying cable modem now :-)
Do you like it?

# posted by

Diana : 6:07 AM